The idea of self-improvement is seductive. It’s nice to believe that you have the power to make small or large changes to the way you think, feel, and behave so that you can experience a better, more fulfilling life. In principle, it’s a good idea. It’s also a realistic idea—you can change for the better if you go about it the right way.
The best way to approach self-improvement is to think of it as giving natural evolution a helping hand. In the course of human life, we all change a little as we grow older as we learn to do less stupid things and more sensible things. For most people, this evolutionary change is so subtle that other people don’t even notice. In addition, devolution is also possible. Someone who used to be at the top of their game becomes a has-been. With self-improvement, accidental change becomes intentional change. While things, both good and bad, continue to happen to you, you are also a change agent, making things happen in return.
With that in mind, let’s take a look at pragmatic self-improvement: opting for effective solutions known to work when trying to feel better, look better, and behave better.
- Resolve your biggest problem right away by getting help.
We all have one major issue that holds us back from living a more fulfilled life. The reason it has become a major problem is because you have no idea how to resolve it. If you did, the problem would be resolved. Under these circumstances, the best form of self-improvement is to ask for help. A classic example is drug addiction. If you have this challenge, you will get better quickly if you seek an outpatient drug treatment program than if you tried to apply some self-help technique.
- Avoid thinking of change as something that happens fast.
Meaningful change takes time. In fact, anything worth doing should be done slowly, carefully, deliberately. It should be done over a long enough period of time so that you attain mastery. If you try to rush change, you only end up doing things superficially and fail to make deep changes that last.
- · You won’t become a black belt in any form of martial arts by simply going to a dojo for a few months.
- · You won’t get good at math by simply watching a few YouTube videos on the Numberphile channel.
- · You won’t learn to develop deep, meaningful relationships with other people by simply going to a relationship seminar.
- · You won’t get rich by buying a get-rich course that gives you some insights into some entrepreneurial field.
- Skip the idea of a complete makeover.
You can’t change everything, and even if you could, you probably wouldn’t be able to find the time to do everything you need to do to make the changes you desire. It’s much more pragmatic to focus on just changing a few things that will make a huge difference.
Common Myths about Self-Improvement
Unfortunately, the idea of self-improvement is often misinterpreted. The result is frustration and little or no satisfactory change. Here are two common myths in the self-improvement field:
Myth #1: I’m Broken
Some people believe that they should change because there is something wrong with them. They think of self-improvement along the lines of original sin. They believe that they are somehow broken or damaged and need to be saved, healed, or fixed.
Myth #2: Unlimited Possibilities
Other people go to the opposite extreme. They believe that they can be more than human, develop extraordinary skills and abilities, have it all, and feel happy every single day.
The problem with underestimating your inherent value as a human being or overestimating what can be achieved with self-improvement leads to deep dissatisfaction with ordinary living.
If you belong to either group, you are always living for a future time when all will be well, fret over how slow you’re changing for the better, and disappointed when you do achieve any success because your imagined success is always greater than your actual success. Additionally, your lust to either heal your flaws or attain super-human attributes makes you vulnerable to slick vendors of “magic bullet” cures, easy answers, and too-good-to-be-true strategies for achieving personal health and well-being. In fact, no amount of books, audio tapes, DVDs, or live seminars will ever fill the emptiness you feel within.
Self-improvement is a good idea if you go about it in a practical way. It can be fun to nudge the evolution of consciousness a little.
