Kelly Ann’s Honest Critique of Blake Shelton’s “If I’m Honest”

Howdy Y’all!  I’m Kelly Ann, and I have a live show on SonicBox.com Come check it out!  I broadcast live 40 hours a week, and I keep it Country!

Blake Shelton has a #1 album on the charts, so I figured it was worth a listen.  We all know about his single “Came Here to Forget”, which is a total winner.   Blake looks gorgeous in the video, and  the cinematography is amazing.  It has that Chris Isaak “Wicked Games” vibe. The only thing wrong with it, is that I’m not in it!

Here’s the video:

As for the rest of the album, well here’s what I think y’all!

Blake Shelton – “If I’m Honest”  Honest Review by Kelly Ann Barrett

The title of the album should have been called “Getting Over Miranda” because that’s what the majority of the songs are about.  We get it Blake, your woman left you. It’s always the girl that leaves, then the guy realizes what a jerk he’s been, and he wants her back. When she doesn’t come back, he’s got to get over her.  Well, Blake, I’m sure you wrote these songs way before you and Gwen starting hooking up, which is fine, but it’s a bunch of whiny bull! Seriously, man up Blake!  Move on! Get over it! Quit your whining! You don’t hear Miranda whining about you, do you?  You blew it.  But now, you’ve got Gwen freaking Stefani!!  She’s a sweetheart, and you better be good to her!  Actually, I have no idea what happened to Miranda and Blake, I’m just blaming Blake because it’s usually the man’s fault! 😉  Anyway, back to the album. we’ll go down the list of songs.

  1. “Straight Outta Cold Beer” – #1. That should never happen #Fail! #2. Cool song!  #3. Any song about beer is a good song.  You’re not a country singer if you don’t sing about beer, trucks and girls.  Oh yeah, and hunting and fishing too! #4. Blake, if you run out of cold beer, you should always have warm beer as a backup! Guinness especially, because the stuff is supposed to be warm when you drink it! Blake’s a “good ol’ boy” though, so I’m sure he just drink’s bud light!
  2. “She’s Got a Way With Words” – #1. About Miranda.  She put the ex in Sex, the FU in my future.  I knew there was “angry bitch” music, like Miranda’s “gunpowder and lead”, but Blake, you’re taking it to a whole new level! Don’t be an “angry bitch”.  You’re a man, and we want to hear man songs like “Hilly Billy Bone”, “Boyz Round Here”, and “Kiss My Country Ass”  You’re gettin’ soft on us!  Man up Blake!!  Get your Balls back!
  3. “Bet you still think about me” – Wah Wah Wah!!  Bet she doesn’t! Get over it!
  4. “Every time I hear that song” – Yeah yeah yeah! Miranda, Miranda, Miranda we get it!
  5. “Came here to forget” – Yup, still tryin’ to forget Miranda, but it’s a darn good song!!  Best song on the album, it’s a hit for sure.
  6. “Every Goodbye” – “We’re both here to get over someone” – AGAIN! We get it! He’s tryin’ to move on!  WAH WAH WAH! Move on already!!  Do like Jimmy Fallon say’s and write about “This bar ain’t tough enough” hahaha!  Y’all see the Jimmy Fallon show where he took Blake out for Sushi?   So funny here it is!
  7. “It ain’t easy” – Thought it was going to about getting over Miranda, but to my dismay, finally!  It ain’t easy leaving Gwen! Phew!
  8. “A guy with a girl” – He’s gettin’ over her!  Now, he’s just a guy with the girl everyone want’s to know!  Yeah, Gwen!  She’s cool!
  9. “Go ahead and break my heart” – Why? Why would you want to do that?  You’re insinuating that you are going to break each other’s hearts?  Y’all are just saying, go right ahead and get it done? It’s gonna happen anyway, so let’s just skip the bull and get to the end? You’re making you relationship fail before it even starts!  What about being positive and saying “I’m never gonna break your heart”, or  sumptin’ like that?
  10. “Friends”  – From the Angry Birds movie – Super Cute!  Watch the video! It’s Blake in the recording studio with all the little birdies!
  11. “One Night Girl” – That’s right Blake!  Gwen is no “wham bam thank you ma’am!” Aw heck, not!  At least this is another one about Gwen.  He’s into her and Miranda’s just a lingering thought.
  12. “Doin’ it to country songs” – Yee Haw!  Now we’re talkin’! Whatever it is we’re doin’, we’re doin’ it to Country songs. It’s upbeat and fun.
  13. “Green” – I think this was an older song of his he just redid. He was green before green was a thing.  I was a redneck before rednecks were cool! That’s my new song!
  14. “You can’t make this up” – It’s cute but probably made up.
  15. “Savior’s Shadow” – Giving thanks to the Lord! That’s right! Every good man knows who’s boss, and every real man can admit it!
There you have it!  There’s my honest broken down critique of the album.
Kelly Ann Barrett
kabfilms.com
imdb.me/kellyannbarrett
Photo Credit Fernando Ulloa jr. Norwalk CT
Photo Credit Fernando Ulloa jr. Norwalk CT

 

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